Feeling Inadequate

  So in case you all did not know I am really hard on myself sometimes.  I am even harder on myself if someone points out my weaknesses.  This last week has been really hard because I have felt like I am not as good as I should be.  Not that I have done anything bad but I feel like I have a lot to work on and need to become a stronger person.  A lot of it comes from Nik being gone and becoming such a stronger person. I worry about him becoming this great person and I am still just me.  I know that I am a good person, but I want to be a great person.  I know a lot of it is in my dumb head, but it is hard to get rid of thoughts of feeling inadequate.  I am trying to be better and wanting to be the best person I can be.  I am hoping to get rid of these doubts by turning to the Lord.  I know that he can help me to understand and will help me grow.  I feel so lucky though at the same time.  Nik's aunt asked me to help her and go to Jerusalem with her at the end of the year.  I have been praying and pondering about it and know that Heavenly Father wants me to be able to have this great opportunity.  So hopefully everything will all work out.  I think that it will be so incredible to walk where our Savior walked and see all the places that are so sacred to us.  I am so grateful to know that I can turn to my Heavenly Father when I am feeling down.  What a powerful thing it is to know that he can help us through anything.... even if it is just self doubt! The nice thing to know is that the Lord will always be there and that he will continue to bless us.  I am looking forward to what will come and know that if I continue to become stronger that my testimony will also grow.  I just feel so blessed and know that the Lord will help me through this if I just ask! 

OH CANADA.... OH CANADA.

 

 The second to last day of the cruise we stopped in Canada! We went to Victoria, which is in British Columbia.  It was nice to pull in and see such a beautiful city.  Kendall and I woke up quite early that day because we were going on another excursion.  I had told Kendall that if he would go with me to the Dog Mushers Camp that I would do whatever he wanted.  Bad Idea.... don't ever say whatever you want to Kendall.  He decided that we were going zip lining. Holy Cow this made me so nervous!!! I had never done anything like this before.... I kept thinking what if the line breaks and then I plummet to my death! I just kept seeing it turning out really bad. 
  That morning was good and we met up with some of the other people that we were going to be zip lining with.  The tour guide took us to Sooke just outside of Victoria.  As we pulled in my stomach was going crazy worrying if I was going to be able to do it or not.  We got all the gear we needed and headed up to the first practice line.  They taught what to do and what not to do.  The first line was not really tall and kind of got you used to it.  Once we finished doing that they took us to some ATVs that drove us up to the top of the mountain.  It was really pretty driving through this thick forest.  We finally made it to the top and could see the first real zip line.  It was up really high!!!! Kendall wanted to go first so he went across the suspension bridge and got all hooked up and went for it.  He was going upside down his first time!! Seriously!  When it was my turn I got up there very nervously and looked at the name of the sign for the first real zip line. It was named Commitment..... very fitting since once you start there is no turning back.  So I am standing on this platform with the one of the guides.  Shar the guide looks at me and says you are going to be the white knuckle rider today aren't you! Those were the perfect words to describe me. So I finally got brave and just walked off the platform and held on for dear life!!! It was amazing once I could get myself to loosen up a little and look down.  It was not as bad as I thought it was going to be! Each time it got a little better!
  There were a total of 7 zip lines so it got better and better! Kendall had a blast and we got some really fun pictures.  The only part that was really scary was we had to walk across this 100 foot suspension bridge to get to another tree to zip line again.  Once to the other side the guide asked how was it Kandus.... I said make me zip line any day before making me walk across another bridge like that.  So once we were at the last zip line the other guide Adam said Kandus you need to let go a little! So he held onto the line for a minute had me sit there and taught me how to lean back and still hold on with one hand.  I guess there was a camera at this line and he said we need to get a good pic of you! So I had one hand on my rope and the other half of me tilting backward as I rode down.  It was really fun!!!! I wish I would have loosened up a little more! The nice thing to know is that I was so afraid of doing it and felt a sense of accomplishment after.  It turned out to be one of the funnest parts of the cruise and I feel really lucky that I got to do it with my brother!

Kendall getting all geared up



A group of us in the ATV




The First real zip line.... It was named Commitment!




Kendall starting out first




Kendall on his first try! Seriously!



Me holding on for dear life!



The 100 foot suspension bridge



Waiting my turn to zip line again! There is a smile on my face now! :)

Kendall on the way down a zip line



The group we went with zip lining




Me with the tour guides Shar and Adam

  After having an awesome time zip lining we had them drop us off in down town Victoria.  It is such a pretty city and I wish that we would have had more time to look around.  We walked through some shops on the way back to the boat.  We also saw the Parliament building and a really cool Hotel called the Empress. There were also some really cool totem poles that we walked past too.  We had quite the walk back to the boat but it was fun to look around at everything! Once we got back to the boat Kort had scheduled for my Mom to get a manicure and for me and her to get pedicures.  It felt so nice after walking all afternoon to have someone rub my feet.  The gal who did the pedicure was great.... she even rubbed my shoulders and put this divine lotion on my neck and shoulders that made it feel all numb and tingly.  All I have to say is that is how everyday should end! We then went and got ready for dinner and enjoyed are last night on the boat! We had to pack all of our stuff and get it out in the hallway that night so that they could prepare to get it off the ship in the morning.  I ended up with my big suit case a little suit case and another gym bag as a carry on.  Good thing I stuck in the other bag because I bought to much stuff! I am so grateful that I had this opportunity to be with my Family and now have some great memories with them.  I feel so lucky to have seen some beautiful areas that Heavenly Father has created for us.  It is amazing to look around and see what is on this earth and how it all started.  All I have to say is it was an AMAZING trip and I feel so blessed!!!!!


Totem Poles in down town Victoria




Totem Poles




Victoria's Parliament Building




The Empress Hotel in Victoria




Victoria



Kendall the last night of the cruise



Kort and Russ... being cheesy!




Me on the last night of the cruise!

 
 

Tracy Arm Fjord Glacier and Day at Sea



Russ took this awesome pic of the Glacier

  About mid way through the cruise we spent a few hours at the Tracy Arm Fjord Glacier.  We had to wake up quite early to see it because we were going to be heading to Victoria in British Columbia.  I am so glad that I got up early and went out to see it.  The Glacier was actually quite far away but there were a lot of ice chunks that had broken off and drifted out to where the boat was.  It was amazing to see these huge ice blocks floating in the ocean.  Here are some of the Pics from the Glacier and surrounding area.  I just have to say that Alaska has some pretty awesome scenery.  I feel very lucky that I was able to go and see what our Heavenly Father has created!

Some of the ice that has broken off the glacier



Me, Dad, and Mom at the glacier




Big ice chunk that has broken off and is floating in the ocean




Me at the Tracy Arm Fjord Glacier




The Glacier is the fartherst in the pic and all white

 After seeing the Glacier and taking lots of pics we all decided that we were way hungry and headed down to breakfast.  All I have to say is that you will never be hungry if you go on a cruise.  They feed you all the time and everywhere you go it seems like there is food.  After breakfast we then went and got ready for the day.... or some of us took naps.  I am not going to name any names because I might of happened to be one of them :)....but once I got ready for the day we ended up wandering around the ship and then finding some nice places that we could all sit and play some games together.  We played phase 10 that afternoon and had a good time being with each other.  There are a few pics of the game that we played.  The one of Kendall was when he was saying he felt like he had gained a lot of weight and needed to stop eating because his tummy was getting bigger.  By the way I still think I won Phase10.... The Family said I did not win because I said we needed to stop to go get ready for dinner.  They said that I gave up and hence I did not win.  I still think they are wrong and I declare that I am the winner!



Mom playing phase 10 with us




Kimo patting his belly




Kort and Me while playing games

  That night after dinner it began to get really foggy.  We started to hear the fog horn and went up to check out what it looked like outside.  We went up to the top deck and when we got there all you could see was fog.  The wind was blowing really hard and it was cold too! You can see by the pic of Kort that she wanted to stay by where the warm air was blowing.  That night it continued to be foggy and they had to use the fog horn throughout the night.  So during the night you would be sleeping and then all of a sudden hear this load horn go off.  O'well you would rather have them blow that horn and keep us all safe!



Kendall with the Fog




Kort trying to stay warm




This what we saw when we looked out trying to see the ocean...Holy Fog!




Kendall walking on the top deck looking at the fog



We found this little guy when we got back to our room to go to bed that night.


  The next day was another at sea day. So of course I slept in and enjoyed it very much! We got up in time for lunch and then went and played more games in the lounge that day. We tried to play a new game of yhatzee hands down.... that game did not go over so well. Kendall said he read the instructions and was teaching us how to play.  None of us really got it but somehow Kendall came out the winner.  After that we played Uno.  That is always a fun game no matter what age you are.  There were a couple of times where Kendall had to pick up a lot of cards.  Especially when he got double draw fours! There is a pick with all the cards that he had at one time.... I think he counted and it ended up being over 20 cards! Yikes! After uno we moved on to two up six down.  This is a famiy favorite! We love playing this game and I have many fond memories of this game with my family.  We played it several times but once again Kendall came out the winner! 



Kendall with all of his 20 cards




Russ and Kort playing Uno




Dad and Mom playing Uno



I have UNO!!!

Dad has Uno too.... He is so funny!

Kort, Russ, and Kendall all decided to go hot tubing that night. It was super cold outside and you could see the steam coming off of the hot tub.  They tried to convince me to go but I hung out with my Mom and Dad and read my book in a nice warm area!


Kendall, Russ, and Kort




Kendall hot tubing..... trying to show the steam coming off the hot tub.




Mom and Dad staying warm and reading there books




Me staying warm




This little guy was there that night when we got back.... he was wearing my shades!

     Kendall and me were getting excited for the next day.  We were going into Victoria..... me and him would be going zip lining. I am not going to lie. I was really nervous about this but looking forward to it at the same time! So next up will be Victoria!!! 

Skagway Alaska

  The day after Juneau we pulled into Skagway.  It was another small little town with lots of little shops and breath taking views.  Kendall and I had chosen to go off on are own that day.  We ended up doing an excursion to the Dog Mushers Camp.  We went up to the camp by bus.  Most of the traveling was done on a dirt road and was quite bumpy most of the way.  Once we got to the camp they put us in a truck that took us up to the top where the dogs are kept.  They have over 300 dogs at this camp and a couple dozen puppies.  Once we were at the top they dropped us off with the Mushers and they got us loaded into these special carts that they use for summer training. They hold six people and have 16 dogs attached to them.  The dogs pulled us around a coarse and followed the commands of the Musher.  It was amazing to see how obedient the dogs were to the commands.  They knew exactly what was expected of them and followed what the Musher said.  After we were done going around the coarse they let us interact with the dogs.  They were really friendly and loved the attention they were getting.  We then loaded back up in the truck and headed back down the mountain.  They let us stop at a lookout and take some really pretty pictures of the valley.  Once we got back down the mountain they talked to us about Dog Mushing and the races that these dogs race in.  After that they let us go see the new puppies.  They were so darling and I so wanted to bring one home with me!!!   



Skagway Alaska





Skagway Alaska- Mushers Camp



Mushers Camp





Me and Kendall at the Mushers Camp





Me with one of the Mushing Dogs

 


Me with a New Puppy!





Kendall with one of the Mushing Dogs



After the Mushers Camp they dropped us off in town.  Kendall and I decided to go to lunch at a little sandwhich and smoothie shop.  After lunch we finally caught up with the rest of the family and did some shopping around town.  On the way back to the ship we got to see one of the trains pull in right next to the boat.  It was pretty cool.  Once we got back to the boat I wanted to take some pics of this cool rock wall right next to the boat.  It is where all the boats put there logo or signature on the rocks.  I loved this one that was a skull.  Maybe because I love bones.... hence why I went into xray and ultrasound.  That night we went to dinner and then went and played shuffle board as we were leaving Skagway.  I had never played shuffle board before.  Russ and Kort were on a team and then me and Kendall were on another.  Russ and Kort totally beat us..... Kendall and I were getting better by the end of the game.  As we were leaving we saw some spectacular views.  The sun was setting and we also saw some more whales too! Skagway was really fun and made me look forward to the rest of the trip! Next up Canada!



Kendall at the lookout at the Mushers Camp



                                                                                



Skagway Alaska





Skagway Alaska





Little town of Skagway



The front of this building I thought was cool it was made
drift wood.




Me and Kort



The Rhapsody of the Seas... The cruise ship we were on.

This is the train that would pull up next to the boat!

This is the cool rock wall with all the ships names



Me and Kort in front of the rock wall



Me! :)





Another little friend they made us



Shuffle Board.... Kendall and Kort



Russ and Me playing Shuffle Board!



Leaving Skayway Alaska.... Waterfall

Sunset in Skagway Alaska



Me and the Family getting warm and watching for whales :)








Whale Watching